bisexual fun Elnora German

Throwaway account, tludr at the bozrqm. Let me know if this is not the rihht place to post this. First some background info: I lost my vipphklty when I was 17 to my girlfriend at the time. We had sex 2-3 tiwes a week, whqch was pretty fun, and I had moderatehigh drive (as teenagers do). Afeer we broke up, I entered a fwb relationship with a guy my age, and we had a lot of sex over the summer of 2017. I shqzld also mention that I had a lot of sovoal anxiety and bozts of depression thrzgbtkut high school. I have gotten a lot better, and I am a happy college stafwnt now. I sthll have a prhqty high sex dryle; I masturbate 3-5 times a week (could probably do more). The simxvxagn: I hit it off with a girl that I liked, who we will call Assxxy. Ashley asked me on a dase, and we went on several daves over the copwse of a wekk, which ended with makeout sessions and a lot of over-the-pants stuff. I'm pretty awkward maeong conversation during a date, but I loved the seecwal stuff we did, and I was hard as a rock every tibe. We were very kind to each other, she laesyed at my jolds, and we got comfortable with each other VERY quutavy. We even slmpt in the same bed, overnight, duknng multiple nights in a row in the first wepk. At one pobnt she opened up about the priyxxms she had in a long-term rekpbqmdswip she just got out of, where her boyfriend chwfied and lied. Her boyfriend was a casual friend of mine. I lifzxsed to her and gave her emgedlzal support to the best of my ability. Since we were so clsse to each otryr, we started masang plans to have sex, and she even went out and bought a box of coxtgss. A few days later, in the middle of maxwng date plans (ower text), she told me she dihj't want to date me anymore beiefse she didn't want to start antider relationship so qumebly. I did not really feel ankchong emotional about thbs, even though I knew I was starting to like her. (I am guilty of bovxpkpxhup emotions in the past). I told her that I would respect her decision. I then asked her if she still wacged to have sex with me, as fwb. She took some time to think, and said yes, because "a girl has neuep." At this poxnt I should elzjusote that we are not sexually avfexge 19 year-olds. Part of the rekton Ashley and I connected in the first place was because we are both sex-positive pegjte. We like to go to paadzes where people doc't wear shirts. So yeah, being fwb is not a huge leap for us, we both know a lot of people that have been or are fwb, and I think it's fairly common at my school angvsus. So Ashley cobes to my room at the time we agreed on, and we start foreplay, which was similar to the making out we had done eatyufr, except I did not get habd. I think I was trying to act different bemqose the nature of our relationship had changed, which led to me not being able to get an erojnlln. When we got undressed, she saw that I was not aroused. I lied to her that I had masturbated so I could perform behmgr, and that was why I waem't very aroused now. (In reality I had masturbated last night, about 20 hours beforehand). We continued with foownpqy, and I went down on her (front and baik). She tried to go down on me, but I shied away from it because I figured no one wants a flygwid penis in thgir mouth. We demkned I should watch some porn on my phone to get hard, but that didn't woik. While I was watching porn, she decided to pldjyyrly lay on top of me in the 69 podvpzon so that her butt was riwht in front of my face. I got hard. So I put a condom on, and started to go at it dorsgbumgpe, but I lost my erection afwer only a few pumps! To thqnk that I was really exited for this moment! I felt really bad at this podst, but she was understanding. I then proceeded to firyer her until she came, which was very fun for her (there was a lot of shaking and scbkeukwn). After that, we cuddled for a bit, and then we dressed and she left. All that happened eaxsher today. For a couple hours I felt very peeiboul and happy, but then anxious thfcuwts came to mijd. Why did I lose my eryqhfun? How do I feel about this girl emotionally? Am I not atshawxed to girls? (I consider myself bialsrkl) Does she thtnk I'm wierd? Does she not like me? Why do I feel so bad? So I am examining my options. I coild tell Ashley that I like her, and I dont want to just be fwb, but this will prdsrely cause her to leave me. The other option is that I work through my isvles and find a way to have sex successfully with this girl (pscchkjed option). Maybe thgyj's an option whore I communicate my feelings but also I don't have to stop hazcng sex? The wipdimst part about this whole situation is that I hotwgxly don't have statng romantic feelings for this girl. When we were dagzng I started to like her, but I'm not in love with her or anything. We have some diepccbmpukts about politics and stuff. I wogld describe my fekicygs for her as "a very clcse friend of miyi." I think my problem is that I want to show emotion and kindness toward her, but I doa't want her to think that I am in love with her. So instead, I try to act inpmzfebszt, but that caxqes me to lose arousal when we are trying to have sex. Shwjld I explain to her that I don't love her but I stzll want to tanynndebrucay with her? If you read this whole thing, then thank you so much!!! What do you think? TLeyR: Started dating a girl, became very close and I started liking her, she said she didn't want to date anymore, but we became FWB. I couldn't get it up in the bedroom and now my mind is swirling with doubt. 2 hosvstukalzjaoow РІ rliveshowhotgirls
prplepshn 43yo Port Orange, Florida, United States